Releasing Our Expectations

A few unexpected events have happened in my week of parenting duties with my children that have fallen short of my "expectations".  They've led me to think about what expectations are and how they play out in our perception of how events unfold and whether we can move on from an event or carry resentment and suffering with us long after the event is over.

Expectations.

Meeting expectations.

Falling short of expectations.

Managing expectations.

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Sandra WangComment
On time

The typical morning here is very busy.  That may be an understatement.  There are a lot of things that need to happen for a whole lot of bodies, sometimes in a certain order, so that we can make it out into the world.  In our house there are three children.  Two are at school, one is a baby.  And there are two parents balancing all the children's needs as well as our own.  Among the parents there is one who is commuting to work and one who is trying to hold onto some semblance of a yoga practice each day.  I'll let you guess who that is.  (And more on "holding on" later).

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Sandra WangComment
On freedom

What are we looking for when we are trying to get all the toys and clothes off the floor?  What are we hoping for when we get to the bottom of the laundry basket?  What are we looking to find when all the dishes are done?  Why are we clearing our calendars so that we can run out and make that yoga class?

It's freedom.

Have you considered what is driving the reason you are looking to get things Done. Sorted. Finished. Cleared. Put Away. Chances are you are searching for Freedom.

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Sandra WangComment
Yoga's Eight Step Mindful Parenting Program

It’s all very well to talk about how yoga can help us become better parents for our children but how?  Do we really think that a bunch of yoga poses and a nice relaxing Savasana at the end will turn us into zen parents, oozing loving kindness for our children at every turn?

Well, lucky for us, behind all the yoga classes, the poses, the Namaste’s and Om Shanti’s there is the Yoga Sutras.  Written many thousands of years ago by a guy called Patanjali, it is a Sanskrit treasure trove of aphorisms that explain what yoga is, what it can do for you and how to go about it.  The "how to go about it" part is tucked away deep in the second chapter as a sort of ancient 8-step program to enlightenment, otherwise known as Ashtanga Yoga, or the eight limbs of yoga.

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Sandra Wang Comments
You are your child's first guru

Being both a yoga practitioner and a parent, I found it useful to look to the idea of the Guru in Indian traditions as guidance in this role.  As a parent, you understand intrinsically that your role is more than a functional and practical one in your child's life.  It is a "job" that encompasses the wellbeing of your child on every level of their being, physical, educational, spiritual, emotional.  This is where the idea that you, as a parent, are actually your child's first Guru comes in.

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Sandra Wang Comments